Should I pray for her to find what I never could? Or could it be that I have grown too far away from my Spira that my resolve has withered. I found myself pondering the other day of things that should not have been thought of.

[private || hackable]

... No one can ever know they are mine. My two darlings, you are truly the most lonely children in these universes. Forgive me.

[/private]

… Lord Wolfram, I fear that the twins have stolen something from Lord Gwendel to give to me for “Mawothers Dai”. Would you mind watching them while I returned it to him?

1025.

A ball? How long has it been since I have attended one? 1000 years? 1020? Not since that time when I ended throwing water in the face of the leader of Bevelle's son for inappropriately touching me - though, the fight with Zaon was much to watch.

... I am becoming nostalgic again, am I not?

Shiva and Ixion are still fighting, I do not know what has gotten into her, she clings to her brother so much so that he almost got bruised. Hmm.

[sitting in a random field outside, enjoying the sunshine. Flowers are strewn about, some are woven into a little girl’s hair and some in Yunalesca’s. On either side of her, are two babies, sprawled out on a mat she knit and fast asleep. Just watching two people walk hand-in-hand together and suddenly feeling an overwhelming urge to cry. Breathing heavily to try and just calm herself down, she can’t help but think about everything and just starts tearing up. The next thing she knows, her head is buried in her arms and her knees are up to her shoulders--and she’s almost crying]

… my two little ones are resembling him more and more everday. Ixion like the former-the way he doesn’t say anything when Shiva pulls his hair; Shiva-the latter, the way she clings to me. No matter how many times we are in the fields, playing games--they will smile, but … I know.

… They are my Zanarkand, are they not? A thousand years I will give them, me alone--no one else.

Thank you, Sir Yuuri for the new residence. It's ... very beautiful. Shiva and Ixion have a tendency to crawl into things, however. Do you happen to have a library where I can store some very, very old scrolls. I fear that they have seen the conditions of children - and they are falling apart.

[locked || hackable]

... How will I fare knowing that Zaon is so far away?

[/locked]

I never, ever want to see you again. I have had enough. Do not talk to me, do not wish to talk to me - ever. You succumbed to your own desires without thinking of Shiva and Ixion - too much.

[ooc; The Bevelle place is cleared out of all her stuff! She's hiding in Zanarkand until she gets a new place. :D]

Shiva cast her first spell today; there are no words to describe how proud of her I am… Amusingly so, Ixion managed to dispel it as well. My darlings, how wonderful the both of you are.

ooc;

Yunalesca is on IC hiatus until I can watch that one cutscene of her and get her back into character!

I miss you, Kadaj.

... A day dedicated to lovers?

I still miss him- I... never want to foget him.

Welcome home, my two little ones; I am very happy that you still remember me.

Is this what you do? When a woman is babbling insanity, you lure her and then take advantage of her? Oh my dear, how cruel of you. Yet ... cliche.

[ooc; FELL. FELL. IF YOU SEE THIS, WHEN YOU'RE OFF HIATUS, CAN WE TALK ABOUT MY BABIES?]

... Who is doing this? Tell me, ... they are ....

Zaon.

Zaon?

All of them, Zanarkand - my people.

Who did this?

Stop!

I watched the Moonflow alone. I always thought it would be different the second time I saw it. Though it is evident that I must get them back myself.

Kadaj, come to Zanarkand- I want to show you something.

I-I need to find them.

K-K-Kadaj?

[the recorded sound of someone groaning in bed and sheets rustling]

. . . H-how did I get here?

[a pause before a cry of pain]

Shiva! Ixion!

[someone hitting the bed]

Urgh, K-Kadaj?

Yunalesca holds Ixion against her chest as she checks outside a window for Kadaj. She sighs slightly, used to the fact that he is incredibly moody and kisses the baby boy that just touches her face in response, as if sensing her fallen expression. From the other side of the nursery Shiva lets out a whimper, hungry for some milk. Ixion shoots his sister a glare and she starts to whimper more. Chuckling to herself, Yunalesca walks back to the crib and lays him down. She leaves the nursery to go to the kitchen to get some milk for the twins.